"Artists" Who Piss Me Off

Scott Stapp:
You egomaniacal f****. You leaving Creed is NOTHING like Sting leaving The Police because (listen carefully) STING HAS TALENT! Pretty nervy to compare yourself to that- but I should have expected as much from you.

Britney Spears:
Seems Kevin is "not the husband she hoped for". On behalf of women everywhere, let me say "DUH!" He's a talentless gold-digging badly-dressed sleazy redneck who left his pregnant girlfriend to screw his way around the world with you... were you expecting Ward Cleaver? Ditch the dead weight, sweetie. You've got a kid to think about.

R. Kelly:
Go to jail. Go directly to jail. Do not collect any royalties. Not only are you a pedophile, your music has become utterly ridiculous trash. "Trapped in the Closet" is not a song... it's an excruciatingly inane narrative being badly warbled without any semblance of a tune.

Nick Lachey:
Yes, you and Jessica both only have talent enough for say... 2nd round of American Idol. But she's hot and smart enough to let her Dad turn her into an empire. Let it go- we all know you married her to try and latch on to that. And because it was the only way to have sex with her.

Nickelback:
Stop it. Just stop it. Your gravelly shouting passed off as singing sounds like you're moments from busting a testicle on EVERY SONG. And that hair.... oy vay, that hair.... the junior high "dammit, I'm growning my hair long" cut looks even worse in gray.

Lindsay Lohan:
We get it. You're a big grown up rebel now, so there. Yes, yes, you can cuss and drink and smoke, oh my. Now do another movie like Mean Girls so we can like you again. (And so you can gain some weight, please.)